The Great Fishbowl Quest #26

Two days ago I had to say goodbye to one of the closest friends I've made during my time here. It was horribly hard, as I feel that these are the first really close friends I've made. This means that this is my first wave of goodbyes that really mean something to me. With my friend's leave, it signaled the end of our core grad group. The worst part is yet to come. A hard goodbye each day starts tomorrow and ends when my wife and I move on Tuesday.

I'm the last leaving of my cohort, meaning there will be none left to see us off. That is something I'm actually grateful for. I like to be the first at a place to welcome and the last to see everyone else off.

This has definitely been the hardest part of the transition from one job to another. To me, finding an available job is easy, finding the right job is a little trickier, but leaving is the hardest part.

I believe that I will stay in close contact with the friends that I have come to love and care about. My wife and I have set up a blog with the hope of being able to keep the friends and "family" we've made here updated.

Like my blogging buddy, my writing background usually allows me the ability to express myself most clearly through the written word. I find it interesting that my last entry is one in which I'm processing as I'm writing. The processing doesn't stop. What will the relationships with my friends become? What will the relationships be like with the new full-time professional peers I'm joining? While this is my last entry in this blog, I have decided to continue blogging throughout my career. What better way to process and track progress? While it will not be a continuation of this blog, I will simply start a new chapter in a new book.

As millions of questions go through my mind, I can't help feeling my heart speeding up. I find my peace, though, in knowing that countless others have gone before us and countless others will follow.

I'm not looking to change the face of higher education, but I definitely want to leave my thumb print on it.

Suddenly I see, this is what I wanna be.... #24

I have spent most of the day watching the series “When We Left Earth” on the Discovery Channel. Sure, there are many more things that I could be doing with my time. Part of this whole post graduate school experience for me is learning how to reclaim my time as my own, and for me this means watching a lot of TV, reading books, and being generally lazy. All this time I am well aware that this should actually just be seen as an extended vacation, as once my job starts I’m sure that my time will be sapped by training and preparation. This almost makes it easier to justify the new levels of lazy that I’m discovering.

Meanwhile, the countdown to the move is officially on. We’re at 23 days and it’s starting to become more apparent that this is something major. My notice has been given at both of my jobs (ah yes, it’s finally time to say goodbye to the Second Job) and within the next 10 days I will be free from the shackles of employment. While I am incredibly ready to start working on new things in a new place, the realization that in 23 days I’ll have to say goodbye to my friends has hit hard. My emotional side has taken over and I’ve spent some time this weekend being pensive and….well….crying. I can’t help that I’ve become so attached to many different people over the past two years, and I can’t help that I’m awful with saying goodbye. This week marks two years since I made the move up here. Three months after that, I was ready to leave. I’ve been anxious to get out of here since then, but something’s changed over the past 6 months. I’ve felt more at home here than before, and my friendships have deepened and become more complex. It will be hard to leave and to know that unless I make a certain effort, I won’t be back.

Tomorrow I am supposed to make the first of my goodbyes. I’ve tried to think about what to say (my English major story writing tendencies kick into gear at these times) but the words aren’t flowing. This will be a unique situation and it’s too personal to explain in its entirety, but it will be the first test of many. I’ll see my closest friend from my program at the end of the week, and we’ll say goodbye – she’s heading off to her new job within the next two weeks.

Then there are my final days of work. My co-workers are more than that to me. The office ceased to be just an “office” a long time ago. The feeling this gives me is inexplicable. I’m already tearing up as I write this.

The following week I’ll travel home for the final time before my departure. While this might not be as emotional since I’ll know that I’ll be back and the people will be there waiting for me, it will still make me cry. I’m getting really good at the whole crying thing.

And with this entry I end my journey of graduate school and job searching. It’s been a long road, but one that’s passed by quickly. I’d do it again in a heartbeat, and many are hoping that I will – the seed of doctorate work has been planted. Nothing is germinating quite yet, but it’s still hanging out there. I’ve already decided to keep my membership with ACPA and I plan on attending the conference next year. I’m sure that using the rest of my professional development funds will not be a challenge; I hope to be a fairly active new professional – at least as active as my schedule will allow.

Journeying into residence life after my sabbatical will be a challenge, and I am fully prepared to encounter many a road block. With any luck my new institution will be as fantastic as I’ve hoped and I will have much support behind me as I start this position. With any luck I will learn more than I could’ve imagined. With any luck my career in student affairs will rocket off to a magnificent start.

With any luck :)

The Great Fishbowl Quest #25

Since my last post I've spent a great deal of time figuring out how to condense all of my experiences both being recruited and recruiting into "tips." I think that the most important thing to remember is that there are no hard and fast rules that I think can apply to every situation. There seems to be pros and cons to most advice that I've read (including pros and cons to "pros and cons" lists). With all of that said, the best advice I can give that I believe is always beneficial is the following:

1. Do all of the research that you have time to do: about the process (how will you find your job?) and about the prospects (what opportunities are available at what institutions?).

2. Ask everybody you know about every prospect you're considering. If you do this, it is necessary that you also find out what every person's bias is (if you're not sure how to figure it out, just ask them) in regards to the institution.

3. Know your worth as a candidate. I think this one aspect is the most important of all in regards to getting the job you want once you find it. I think this is also critical to know in regards to how you design your search process. The best way to find out your worth is to talk to supervisors, instructors, and others in the field about your strengths, experiences, and weaknesses. Once you've identified your worth as a candidate, you'll have the ability to tailor your strategies based on the jobs you're applying for. For example, knowing I have apartment experience, I had more negotiating power with positions that would benefit directly from that experience.

4. Have the end in mind. Yes, we all want the perfect job in the perfect location for the highest pay (and we'd like to have it on the first day we start our search). Know that you can hold out early in the process, but need to cash in the chips before everybody stops playing.

5. Network throughout the whole process. More than likely you're going to communicate with more professionals during the job search process than you can remember. No matter how good of a candidate you are, you're only going to be able to accept one position at one institution. Because of this, you should use this experience (and get your money's worth) by connecting to as many professionals as you can and keeping contact with ones who share your same interests.

That's it. That's all I've got. I'll try to stick to those Top Five and save anything else I come up with for those that I'm lucky enough to mentor through the process next year. Ooh...make that Number 6...

6. Mentor a brand new candidate. Mentoring somebody new helps refresh your mind and helps put your own nerves at ease. Speaking as an Employer who has recruited before, it is also fantastic to see a candidate that you're interviewing introducing other candidates.

Alright--with that said--I'm going to go find some more boxes to pack. I move in 12 days. Woah.

Suddenly I see, this is what I wanna be.... #23

Things have been busy over the past few weeks. I've been settling down into my routine of working both my jobs and being as lazy as I can in between. I took a week off and traveled back home to see my family and also be a part of my best friend's wedding. My duties as Maid of Honor were extensive and tiring, but I had so much fun seeing old friends and dancing the night away.

Now it's back to working and preparing for the move. I brought some boxes back with me and they're sitting awkwardly in my apartment. I dropped off a bag of clothes (the first of probably many) at Goodwill and started going through drawers and cabinets to find things that need thrown away or that can be packed already. I find myself looking at my new institution's website frequently, fantasizing about what it's going to be like when I get there. A friend of mine has committed to helping me move and we've already started planning out the road trip. Things are definitely in motion.

I've been thinking a lot about the advice I would give to those who will be starting the job search next year, especially those who have never done something like this before - those people who, like myself, went straight through their education and find themselves with little clue as to how to conduct any sort of mass market job search. Here are a few things I've come up with:
- Make sure you have a handful of references that can attest to your experience is different areas.
- Have more experienced people look at your resume...a lot.
- Do all that you can to make it to a conference, and go with others that you know if you can. Having that support system there will be helpful, and getting the experience of interviewing in a high pressure situation will be helpful later on.
- Be wary of falling in love with a place because it "seems" wonderful.
- Read job descriptions thoroughly, and always do research on institutions you think you'd want to be at.
- Prepare some standard interview questions for each place you'll interview with as a way of measuring them against each other.
- Never underestimate the power of the pro and con list. It can help make your decision very clear.

The Great Fishbowl Quest #24

There are a lot of moments that have made me feel successful as a job-searching candidate, but I am eager to refer to myself now as a professional. I have held the belief that I've acted as a professional throughout my graduate work, so in most ways I don't see myself as a new professional. I do see myself, though, as a young professional with a lot to learn.

I am excited to say that I feel I have already made a large contribution to the institution I'm joining. I had learned that there was another position open at this institution and that they were still searching. One of my friends hadn't yet accepted a position and hadn't committed any excitement to many of her prospects. With her permission, I sent an e-mail to the two people that were heading the candidate search and an interview was set-up. She was invited onto campus and later offered the job!

The excitement for me is two-fold. My supervisor was involved in the candidate search and has now seen my commitment to recruiting that I mentioned enjoying. Also, I opened a door to my friend who accepted the job that they offered. It is probable that we will tag-team a large residence hall together. It is also a relief to think that I may get to work closely with a person that I already have a good relationship with.

Of course, being realistic, there is room for some concerns. The classic roommate example: yes, always been friends and worked together years ago, but will we clash heads running a staff of 30-something together? How will the fact that we already know each other be taken by other staff members?

I am far more excited than worried and I believe that in the eyes of my new supervisor, I'm already a professional at the institution.

The Great Fishbowl Quest #23

I read on my friend's Facebook page that she was stressed because she had two interviews in two days. Wow. Now I understand the reason it is so hard to describe placement exchanges to people.

I've learned that one of the easiest ways to explain my completed job search is through numbers.

100's: the number of positions I was qualified to apply for at institutions represented at the 2 placement exchanges I went to.

70+: the number of positions, institutions, and communities my wife researched.

19: the number of interviews I did at the 2 placement exchanges (not including second interviews).

30: the typical amount of minutes you get to spend forming an opinion in an interview.

10: the number of on-campus interview offers I received.

3: the number of on-campus interviews I took.

3: the number of jobs offered.

1: the number of jobs I took (thankfully).

Interestingly enough, the very first institution that contacted me for an interview, the first interview of the first day of the first placement exchange (SPE) ended up being our first choice of schools.

Before--and I believe I've posted about this--I held the opinion that you should schedule a "warm-up" interview if at all possible. Now I would recommend not going into your first interview with that mindset.

On a completely different note, few people have started leaving yet. I thought at this point I would be saturated with disappointed (yes...saturated...figured my body would be absorbing spilled tears and leaving a layer of salt over my skin). More than anything, I feel that this time in Pergatory (what I've taken to calling my current job) is preparing me mentally to leave. I'm not sad or concerned about leaving those I've come so close to. I believe the relationships that matter most to be will continue regardless of the distance. If they don't, then it will be because they lose importance.

Now it's time to get to packing and prepping the office for the next one coming in. Less than a month until I move.

28 days...

Suddenly I see, this is what I wanna be.... #22

It seems that many of my peers from my class have received job offers and have decided where to go for work. The congratulatory emails to the listserv have been trickling in, although I admittedly have no idea how many people are still searching. I lost count awhile ago as to who was actually finishing the spring and who still had a few more classes to pick up. My class had many students get full-time positions along the way, causing them to either halt the program for a semester or two or just greatly slow down their progress. Although no one has said that we've had an abnormally large number of people get positions mid-program, I don't remember this happening last year quite like this.

I'm back at it again at my assistantship, which I guess really isn't my assistantship anymore. I referred to myself as a "GA" this past week and was corrected. It doesn't really feel any different, but serving as a 'Temporary Part-Time Advisor' sounds pretty spiffy. I don't think that I've ever really come out and mentioned that I haven't been working in residence life during grad school. It feels sneaky to write it here, since it seems that all the other bloggers (from this year and previous years) have all been RHDs or ARHDs. But the truth is out: I am, perhaps, a rare breed since I have no graduate live-in res life experience, yet was offered and accepted a position in residence life. To all those who may be looking to do the same, it's obviously possible. My undergraduate res life experience was helpful, as was an internship I did this past year with a hall director. But it was an uphill battle all the way.

I've been skimming through some of my old posts and reliving the experiences, in addition to just remembering back to what it was like to be at ACPA and interview through placement. The more I think about it, the more I realize how anxious I was to fall in love with a school and how I pretty much jumped on Number One Institution because of it. While they offered some of what I was looking for, I'm seeing more now that I gravitated towards them because of how familiar they seemed. They are, in essence, the mirror image of my undergraduate institution - only on a slightly larger scale. And while I will campaign for this type of school (especially in the type of place that I attended) until the day I die, I can say that that probably would not have been the best move for me right now. I think another reason I wanted to like them so much is that they were the first place to contact ME for an interview at ACPA instead of having me chase them down.

The more I think about The New Job and that school, the more I realize how much I loved it without even realizing it. Like I mentioned before, I can remember finding the position description and absolutely falling in love. I read it to my best friend (who immediately stamped it as 'too far away' and dismissed it) and my mom and being so incredibly excited about it. When I secured that interview for the conference (the first I scheduled, and my very first one of placement) I was so pumped that they were giving me a chance. My interview with them lasted nearly an hour. I had stars in my eyes when I realized what I would be doing and who I could be working with. I met many people, all of whom seemed so happy to be meeting me and anxious for me to like THEM just as much as they liked ME. I got positive feedback that felt genuine. I did follow up with them, did a lot of hoping and wishing, and then was able to get the campus interview.

It's funny, but I really wanted to hate that place. If nothing else, just so that decision making would be easier for me. With an offer on the table and (at the time) no concept of what kind of timeline they were working with, I figured that accepting the offer out there already would be the easiest/best thing to do. I didn't realize how crazy I was being, and how much in denial I was. Being terrified to turn down an offer without having another option was the driving force behind my thoughts. When I realized how much I really liked this position and this institution, I panicked. I am grateful for fast-moving individuals that were able to make it happen so quickly, and who, I'm convinced, saved me from making a really big mistake.

So now I look forward, perhaps on a ridiculously high scale, to mid-July when I made my move and start this job. I allowed myself to pack one box (just books) and then realized that it didn't make a dent into anything from my shelf. My tendency to impulsively buy books is always a pain to deal with when it comes time to move. And my large collection from my undergrad English major years just adds to it. I'm definitely faced with a huge undertaking.

The Great Fishbowl Quest #22

Campus is completely silent. Students have been gone for weeks and summer classes don't start for a couple more. My wife and I just got back from taking one of our usual evening walks around campus. It was then that I realized we're moving in five weeks and it seems that only now do we "own" the campus we're currently on. We're not going to feel comfortable walking around our new campus at night five weeks from now. We'll be starting from scratch all over again.

I've been thinking a lot about how I want to wrap up this blog. I know that I want to do the traditional "what I've learned" ending, but I don't want it to be anything that makes the search sound too simple or complex.

For example, many people will tell you that "you'll just know" when you find the right place (the same thing you hear when you're looking for Mr. or Mrs. Right), and that's misleading. I know a few individuals who have held onto that idea and haven't found "the place" and are taking jobs that they are treating as temporary (a horrible idea to treat a job as temporary because of the underlying attitude that will play into all taken actions) or are still searching.

I think that you can certainly know the wrong place(s), but falling in love with a place based on first impressions can be dangerous. The institution I have chosen became my number one, but moved up and down the list multiple times.

Started high early in my research (in my top three out of the first ten to fifteen schools I looked at), but then plummeted to the bottom third after I had researched about thirty.

Jumped high again when I interviewed at SPE, but I enjoyed a good number of the interviews I did.

Throughout the rest of my search, it peaked and fell a number of times, but with each phase I got to see more of the complexities associated with the institution, position, and professionals. Eventually, I "knew" it was the right place, but at no point did the skies open and shine a golden light with a chorus of angels singing.

I'll share more of what I learned later on, but that seemed especially important at this time. It seems that too many individuals take things at face value and base some large decisions on feelings and emotions (which provide important pieces of information, but not all the needed pieces).

Suddenly I see, this is what I wanna be.... #21

I never thought things would be as hectic has they have been over the past week.

Graduation was emotional. I participated in two separate ceremonies and cried my way through one. My family and best friend came to see me and that made it even more special. It still hasn't hit me that it's all over. My grades have posted, I've done the ceremony, but I still don't feel like it's over. Everyone tells me that it will start to feel over when the fall comes and I'm not enrolled in classes, others say that it'll be months after that when I finally feel like it's done.

I've taken the last week to rest up and try to return to society as a functioning human. My assistantship encouraged me to take some time off before starting up my summer gig with them, and so I picked up lots of hours at The Second Job instead. I made a trip to my hometown for a few days, and now I'm back and ready to get back to work tomorrow. I have the next two months of my life planned out pretty well; I know when I'll be working at my jobs and when I'll be going back home. My best friend gets married next month and I'm looking forward to an extended visit at home with my family and friends. One of my close friends that I made during the past two years has offered to help me move, and I've snatched up his offer. I already reserved my truck and made my tentative moving plans. Can you tell how much I love to schedule things?

I made a trip to my undergrad to see some old professors and mentors. It was great to spend time talking with people and sharing my success with them. Being back on campus was also wonderful, and I'm amazed that after two years it still feels like home. Things have changed, but not the degree that it has altered the feeling I get when I drive on campus. I've managed to make it to homecoming and graduation these past two years, but it's odd to know that I might not get that chance again.

People are telling me to take some time off from the insanity of my summer and do something fun. Oddly, I don't really WANT to take any time off. I'm anxious to save up money and start to plan (go figure) how I'll start paying off my debt. While I'd love to do something absolutely amazing before I go off and become an adult, I'm not going to attempt to find what that might be already. I'd rather stumble upon something and make it happen. My spontaneous side has to come out somewhere, right?

The Great Fishbowl Quest #21

My wife and I got to check out our apartment and were super-excited with what we saw. I'll talk about my thoughts on my job next week. With people leaving, this post will be focused more on the cohort than the job search.

For those entering grad programs, I strongly recommend the cohort system. Early in my blogging I talked about some of the rules that seem implied, but overall, the experience has been a beneficial one. Throughout the past two years, I have established great relationships and learned from many of my student colleagues. I've also learned to actively defend my opinions and have learned what battles to fight and what to pass up. During this past semester, everybody's professional identity seemed to be fired into a finished product. At the beginning, it was hard to distinguish any of us except by our previous institutions. By the end of the program, though, everybody's strengths and weaknesses seemed to be highlighted and known.

Many close friendships were formed, but the good also comes with the bad. I think, though, that this is a characteristic of a healthy program. There were many people in the program that formed relationships that will benefit them both professionally and personally, while there were others who seemed to be focused on getting the "free" degree for the least amount of effort.

I know that assistantships (especially in Housing & Residence Life) often bring people who aren't necessarily interested in doing graduate level work or making a career in student affairs. Overall, though, I think that more good is reaped for the profession and that those who aren't cut out for the profession will often weed themselves out--or be weeded out when found.

With that in mind, I haven't sorted out my feelings on everybody getting hired, but they did (or at least have offers on the table). It doesn't surprise me that we all landed our jobs; our program has produced qualified professionals with great attitudes and ethics (if I do say so myself) and our alumni are appreciated by their employers.

My hope is that all of us leaving keep our good name in mind and continue to open the doors for others that will be following us. In some unflattering terms, I hope we spread like a virus, are saught after like addictives, and live as long as cockroaches (who I hear can survive nuclear blasts).

The Great Fishbowl Quest #20

Congratulations to my blogging buddy! I finally had the opportunity to officially accept my position this past Monday. The past two weeks have wrapped up this chapter in my life pretty well. My parents and wife were there to watch me graduate this past weekend, I accepted the job I wanted at Number One Institution working for the supervisor I wanted to work for in one of the buildings I wanted to be in. What else could I ask for?

During the ceremony, I spoke to my friends (and those I didn't know) sitting around me in the front row. Everyone around me was receiving a Master's in education and I felt it was important to take a moment to remind everybody of something we tend to forget in our field. Those of graduating with a Master's have an experience that most people will never have. In our world, everybody we work with is college-educated or attempting to be. In the world outside of our campuses, though, college provides an experience that many people will only know of through television and movies. So for those of you graduating, realize the accomplishments that you have made, and pat yourself and your friends on the back (just try not to mess up the hood).

I feel extremely grateful to already have a job secured, because with that comes having a place to live secured. While just about everybody in my cohort has secured a job, I know of others that are still searching for that position. Almost everyone I know has been offered, but many offers have been turned down. I believe everybody I know will get a job, the field is currently full of vacancies. I just wish everybody the same luck at knowing when to cash in their chips.

And finally, I leave a question for anybody reading. A current discussion among the cohort is on which professional association to join (the two biggies, ACPA or NASPA).

ACPA seems to focus on the professional, while NASPA seems to focus on the profession.

By this I mean that a lot of new professionals lean to ACPA and networking and professional development sessions seem to be the focus, while NASPA seems to be a bit more based in research.

Now before I get a billion comments, I understand that both ACPA and NASPA do much of the same. I feel that both accomplish different goals, though, and I'm trying to figure out which path to take. Many have told me to join both, but I want to join one so that I can focus my contributions.

And please don't tell me to pick based on the national conference location, you might make me throw up in my mouth a little.

Suddenly I see, this is what I wanna be.... #20

Just as quickly as everything came to the boiling point, everything simmered back down.

I headed to my on-campus interview trying to keep a clear mind. This was my #2 choice from the ACPA interviews and I knew I had to be fair with this. Since my #1 choice was no longer in the picture, obviously this became a little more important. My trip to the campus was fun and on a very beautiful day. I arrived, and I think one of the first things that came into my head was "Oh shit."

The campus is beautiful. Coming from an undergraduate institution that had the most amazing scenery, I'm pretty tough on other campuses about their atmosphere. This place looks like it's out of a movie. I loved it.

My interview day was full and tiring, but very helpful. I met so many people, all of whom were fantastic. I spoke to a few students and got to be a fly on the wall in the office during my breaks. By the end of the day I knew that I really liked this place, and I knew that was just going to complicate my decision. I was lucky because they were already moving quickly with the search and so it went perfectly with my accelerated timeline.

I left campus and burst into tears. In my head I'm thinking, "Great. WTF am I supposed to do now?!"

I am lucky to have supportive people all around me, and after a few hours of thinking and talking, good food, and a few drinks, I realized that I wanted nothing more than to get that job. If they passed on me, I would accept the other offer. As the night wore on, I wanted the job more and more. As I kept thinking about all the positives about the position I started kicking myself for not giving THAT much more energy and enthusiasm during the interview.

Apparently, my self criticism wasn't that necessary.

Yesterday, while sitting in the parking lot of a restaurant off of some random exit on some highway, I got the call that offered me this position and I immediately accepted. I will be moving in a few months to embark on the next leg of my journey through student affairs and to start a position that will bring me challenges and positive experiences. As my mom pointed out - I went on two campus interviews and got two job offers. Lucky doesn't even begin to describe it.

I have actually managed to accomplish what I set out to do so many months ago; I have job by graduation. This weekend I will walk across the stage and be incredibly proud that I finished this degree and obtained a position that I fell in love with back in February. I remember the moment I read the position description and thought, "Wow. This could possibly be the best position ever." The journey to get to this point has been exhausting. I finally feel like I can sleep and eat normally and not worry about what to do with my life. It's been almost exactly 5 months since I applied for my very first position. I am glad that this process was so successful for me (and for my blogging buddy) but I also realize that it's not been that way for many others. There are only a handful of us in my program who have already accepted positions and the rest are still actively searching and interviewing.

For the rest of the summer I will continue at my assistantship and keep plugging away at my second job. The packing and cleaning will start soon (Because I seriously love nothing else more than packing. Really.) and then I'll be off on my next adventure. Let's hope it's as great as I think it could be.

Suddenly I see, this is what I wanna be.... #19

You would think that by now I would be used to the unexpected when it comes to my job search, but I am constantly surprised by happens.

This week I was offered an on-campus interview which I immediately accepted. This comes from an institution that really interests me and for a position that seems like it could be the best thing ever.

Two days later I received my first job offer.
I hate to say that I wasn't surprised, but I wasn't. I knew I nailed that interview, but I guess I didn't realize what kind of an impression I had made until the bargaining started after I said I'd need some time because I had another interview lined up. I am completely unprepared for feeling of being recruited for a position. Luckily, my supervisors at my assistantship are wonderful, caring people. Each one of them dealt with me in the midst of my freak out, and they all helped to talk me off the ledge.

That same day I found out that an institution I had JUST applied to days beforehand was already checking my references. I went from having virtually nothing on the horizon to multiple things going on all at the same time.

I'm losing my mind.

In all truth I am in a much better place now than I was a day ago. I felt like I was walking around in a daze, and I was. Maybe I still am. I am constantly weighing my options and trying to decide what decision I should make. I am giving this on-campus interview a fair shot, but I'm wondering what decision I will make once it's all over. If I like what I see and feel at my interview I will have to decide whether or not I have the metaphorical balls to turn down my other offer. If I'm not 100% after the interview.....I will probably take the offer. The job offer is a decent one, and it's a position that I know I would be great in. My friends beyond the realm of higher ed have all said that they would pick this job for me out of any other ones that I have floating around as options. I'm taking this into consideration, regardless of whether or not I should, because these friends know me better than most.

I've been told to take some time to do some soul-searching following my interview. Despite how busy I will be, I plan on following this advice and do some major thinking.

On the other side of the coin, my life as a graduate student is officially done. Classes are completed, coursework is turned in, my last hours at my assistantship are clocked in. I just wait for graduation and for the celebrations to begin.....with or without an accepted position.

The Great Fishbowl Quest #19

It seems that today is the day that I can no longer avoid the fact that I'm going to be sad to leave all of the relationships that I've established here. Already, I don't look forward to losing the opportunity to work with my close friends. While here, I've learned that good colleagues can be hard to come by and excellent colleagues are rare finds. I get that I'll still get to keep in contact with these people, but the chance I'll get to work with them again is slim.

This past weekend a group of us got together for a cookout and the following night my wife and I had the opportunity to have dinner with one of my faculty members and her husband. Both of these experiences pointed to the fact that only recently have we finally felt that we're at home...and we'll be leaving in two months.

The idea of starting over is exhausting.

As I type this, a few of my friends are playing some Wii together, but I had to pass as my staff needed my immediate attention. The opportunities left to spend any quality time together are quickly diminishing and "arguments" are on the table of which professional associations should be joined if we ever expect to see each other again.

I'm sure I'd be frightened if I was told the number of times I would hang out with each of my friends before one of us moved away or if I was told the number of times we'd ever have a real conversation in person again. I'd like to think that some good piece of news would come out of that revelation (that I could work side-by-side with one of my close friends again and still consider that person a close friend), but I know that's a wish made for a Hallmark card.

So for now, I'm going to attempt to handle these feelings by crawling into bed and trying to sleep them off (I know...that's a healthy dose of avoidance). Tonight my wife and I will cook dinner and say our goodbyes to the staff (that will still be working for the remainder of the week), Friday I'll say goodbye to my peers and faculty, and Saturday I'll say goodbye to grad school.

Today's a day of missing.

Suddenly I see, this is what I wanna be.... #18

I have no idea where the past week has gone. I can't even claim that I've been busy everyday as my blogging pal has been - to be honest, I've been hit with a wave of laziness.

Last Friday I got one "Thanks, but no thanks" email from an ACPA employer that I liked. Then within hours after that I got another email from a different employer telling me the same thing about two positions I didn't even know I was being considered for. Unfortunately, this happened to be my number one choice and the ambiguity of the email left me wondering if I was being canned for the position that I really liked, in addition to these other ones that I was totally not interested in. I fired off as much of a professional "wtf?" reply email that I could. Then I had a complete breakdown and completely gave up. I couldn't even tell you what I did for the rest of the day besides stare at my inbox and just dare someone else to email me and turn me down.

My weekend turned hectic and interesting, and I wasn't surprised that there was a full moon. I swear, the most random stuff happens to me. So after working and dealing with many other things, I started my week. I did the class thing, I did the homework thing, I did the working thing. Today is a complete and total day off for me, and I'm planning on enjoying it. I've managed to knock out the last bit of school work that I needed to do. All is left is finishing up a few things for my internship and actually making it through this last week of class.

A bright spot amongst all of this was the announcement of an opportunity for summer employment. My assistantship (which, by the way, is the best place to work with the nicest people ever) has found the money to offer me a temporary part-time position from graduation until mid-August. This has now bought me three more months of job searching time if I need it. I can keep my second job and try to save money while still being able to pay my bills and hunt for a job. This took a HUGE load of anxiety away from me. While I'd love to find a job as soon as possible, knowing that I have a little extra time is great.

I'm also comforted to know that my classmates don't seem to be having much more luck with their searches. Some have gone to more on-campus interviews (I'm holding steady at one so far) but people are getting rejected and not really liking many of the places that they're going to. At least I know I'm not the black sheep of the program that just can't find something.

I did get a reply from my number one school who clarified that their initial email was only in regard to those two positions. I can only assume that they haven't yet made their decisions for the position that I'm interested in. I made some phone calls today and left messages for those people I spoke with at ACPA that I was interested in. Since last week I've applied for 4 or 5 more positions and I've got a few more to crank out over the weekend. I have two weeks until graduation. I can't believe the past two years have all come down to these final two weeks.

The Great Fishbowl Quest #18

So much has happened this week, I could have blogged each day. This has been my most challenging and rewarding week of grad school.

Sunday: Got back from a wedding pretty late and stayed up until I fell asleep working on my last big grad school project. Too bad half of the group members hadn't sended me what I needed to complete the project. Oh well, at this point, we still have 36 hours...

Monday: Never really went to sleep, so I never had to worry about really waking up. Totally sick; I was hoping it was just allergies, but there is a fever attached. Literally worked all day on school work, aside from two staff meetings that were excrutiatingly long. Prepped for our big presentation tomorrow. Still waiting to hear from a job. I'll be up all night, I'm fine if they call...

Tuesday: The presentation was amazing! I'm so glad we met our own expectations, we were more concerned about that then the professor's expectations. He said he felt like he was at ACPA, which means we reached our normal expectations of ourselves. We spent nine hours in one room finishing the research paper attached to our presentation. We became literally loopy with the sleep deprivation we've experienced this week. I got the call! It is still not an official offer, as it has to go to somebody like a Vice Chancellor or something, but there are four jobs, and they submitted four names. I can expect the official within 5-7 days. Just when I thought it was over, my wife became sick enough to require a trip to the emergency room. In bed by 3:00 a.m. My fever still isn't gone.

Wednesday: My body finally staged a mutiny against me and knocked me out. I slept most of the afternoon. When I wasn't sleeping, I was attempting to prep for my last two finals tomorrow. We requested them a week early for those of us in Housing who will be chained to our office next week during checkout. We had a taco night for the RAs in our area. Things are slowing down enough that I'm realizing how much I'm going to miss this place.

Thursday: Two finals, picked up my robe for graduation. Finished my classes! I'm officially done! At the closing banquet, I was awarded the GA of the Year award. I was completely surprised, but very grateful. I feel that I've made a lot of contributions to the department as a whole in my two years here, but that as a hall director, others have done more. Regardless, it was the most important award to me that I could have received.

Friday: I just found out I have a meeting in 26 minutes and I'm not ready for it. So...back to running.

I'm welcoming myself to the first full day of being a professional without being a grad student at the same time...

The Great Fishbowl Quest #17

Once again, I'm posting while in another state. This time, though, I'm in my home state, visiting family. I'm anxiously awaiting any news from the institution I'm hoping takes me in. At this point, pretty much everyone (at school and at home) knows what our hopes are. I can't think about re-entering the search process at this point; most institutions I'm interested in are close to wrapping up their process.

I just recently learned that whyen I declined my #2 a week ago, they had to reopen their search process. They had only invited a very small number of candidates onto campus and now they seem to be back to square one. I only know this because a person in my cohort was contacted the afternoon that I declined the opportunity.

I love attempting to explain how this process works. I find it hard to give advice to anybody new to the process, as it requires so many personal variables. Somebody recently asked me, "How do you decline your #2 without any assurances of your #1?"

My answer was, "Very carefully."

Our job searches in student affairs require a level of gambling (most true in entry level positions, from my viewpoint). We interview with a number of institutions, all on different timelines, choose the best fits (usually with some level of ranking), and have to choose how long to hold out for. In addition to that, many of us will attempt a level of negotiating and find leverage through offers.

I think that this is the most challenging (and most exciting...and frightening) part of the process. I had the realization last week that I've officially declined two job offers (one I declined twice) with the hope of getting the only other job I took an on-campus interview for. While I feel rather confident with that decision, there are others who have made similar choices and feel that they've put themselves in jeopardy.

Only time will tell (I'm hoping my time will be Monday). At this point, I believe only 1 of 16 people I know job searching have accepted a position.

Will I have my #1 job? Will I need to make our families cry and develop a last-minute plan? Stay tuned...same bat time, same bat channel...

Suddenly I see, this is what I wanna be.... #17

Hi, my name is Emotional Mess and Anxiety.

Yesterday I had a spontaneous crying fit in the office. Maybe it wasn't so spontaneous, since one of my supervisors asked how I was and that sort of brought it on.

I am very much aware that my time left at my assistantship and in this program is running out. I would very much like to find a job so that I can figure out my gameplan for the next few months. This whole waiting around thing isn't really working for me anymore, and if I was okay with it, it still wouldn't make this whole decision-making process any easier.

My interview from last week went well. Aside from completely rambling through a presentation, it was good. Great? Awesome? I can't even tell. Would I be surprised if they called and offered it to me.....no. I don't want to say that I expect it, but I can definitely see it happening. What would I say if that happened.....I have no idea. I'm making it a practice to not answer any numbers I don't know that have that area code and exchange. I'd rather get a voicemail and then have time to process things. At this point (and to the disappointment of many, I'm sure) I would probably take the job. Not saying that I wouldn't do some additional follow-up with the other places that I liked at ACPA, but unless someone said "Oh, I was just about to call you!" I'm not sure I could turn it down.

In the meantime, I'll continue sitting and waiting. Patience may be a virtue but it's certainly not one that I possess. If nothing else, I suppose this job search has given me a lesson in that.

The Great Fishbowl Quest #16

Well, I’ve been waiting to post with secrecy in regards to where I was at in the process. Only very few people know that I’m blogging, but my family was included in the few. Because my wife and I were doing essentially two separate regional searches, our parents have been holding their breath.

This past week the best/worst thing happened in our opinion. We received a fantastic offer from an institution in the Far-From-Home Region and another fantastic offer in the Close-To-Home Region. If it was that simple, the choice would be Close-To-Home, right?

Comparing these two offers felt as if we were comparing apples to...radios. The communities, the job opportunities, the institutions, etc. were completely different. However, with regards to the “totality of circumstances” (thanks, “Law and Ethics” course) it became a clear decision.

My wife and I committed to making a decision before either offered. If this is your first job search, I believe it is critical to trust your original impression of an institution. Offers make opportunities look so much more amazing. That is why it is important to journal your thoughts as you go through the process.

Knowing all of this, we made our decision prior to any offers this week. We had privately chosen Close-To-Home with no intention of sharing this decision until it was official. The first to call was Far-From-Home on Thursday. I asked to have until this coming Monday to provide a response. I spent (what felt like) all day Friday trying to get in touch with Close-To-Home to find out where I was in their process. It had been made clear to me multiple times that I ranked rather high on their list, but I had no intentions of banking on that.

With two conflicting schedules, I was never able to speak with my contact at Close-To-Home, but received an e-mail that has rather clearly laid out where I am in their process. For legal reasons, though, they cannot officially offer me a position. This means that in communicating, I have to pick up enough signals to know that I’m secure.

With that said, I have a hard phone call to make Monday morning to Far-From-Home. It also means that I’m bungee-jumping without a cord and hoping that Close-To-Home follows through with an offer, because legally they don’t have to. If some type of snag happens, there is no Plan B. I’ve turned down all other campus offers except one or two that have me listed as a Plan B candidate. Close-To-Home won’t finish interviewing until this coming Friday, meaning I’m holding no hope of knowing anything until next Monday at the earliest.

My wife and I feel good enough to share it with family, but let’s just say we haven’t gone out to dinner to celebrate the new job yet.

In the meantime, my job search is complete (we’ll keep praying) and I passed my comprehensive exam. All I have to do now is buckle down for a few more course projects, meet my own expectations in class, and prepare this office well enough that somebody new can step in and take over.

I can’t wait to truly share my excitement with my peers, but some of there are still early in their process and with me finishing my process, new stress is added to them.

Suddenly I see, this is what I wanna be.... #16

Ring.

Ring, dammit.


As I stare at my phone repeating this over and over, I can't help but feel like this is a futile attempt at getting a callback. Still, it makes me feel like maybe I'm willing some employer out there to think about me and dial my number.

In other words, since I've returned from ACPA I haven't heard much of anything. I had a reminder email to officially apply for a position online (which I did) and a response to an additional thank you email I sent. My gainfully employed friend (and previous fellow student) has told me to be patient, and that by the end of the week I will hear things. He doesn't understand that I'm not patient in any sense of the word and I don't understand why people aren't calling me NOW.

I have a list of other job descriptions I need to go through and apply for, but it's hard to concentrate on the idea of applying more places when I fell in love with so many others already. I have an on-campus interview this week and I'm trying to prepare for it, but it's difficult when it's in a different aspect of higher ed than what I've been interviewing for. I can't help but be really unconcerned about it. I'm completely proficient in this area and I've nearly done this exact same thing in the past. I feel like I could do it with my eyes closed, and I feel like I'd be awesome in this position....but do I want it? Do I really want it? And what would I do if they offered it to me? What if they offered it to me in the midst of interviewing at other places for other positions? What if they offered it to me when I hadn't heard back from other places at all? Ugh. Too many "what ifs" for me to think about right now.

It's starting to set in that I'll be done with school in one month. I can't believe how fast these two years have gone by, and how incredible they've been . I've learned so much, and in such a different way than I did during my undergrad years. I had a nearly tearful conversation with my supervisors last week about how much I've grown as a person and as a professional. I'm glad that others can see it just as much as I can. I must be doing something right :)

The Great Fishbowl Quest #15

Well, with another on-campus interview complete (third of the season), I think that I’ve seen enough. I’m on the fast timeline, which means at this point I’ve started declining on-campus interviews that I otherwise would have enjoyed visiting. I hope that I’ve declined in a matter that hasn’t shut any doors for future opportunities.

I’d like to provide an update on the institution with a quick turn-around on the job offer. When I e-mailed them, I expected them to offer an extension, even though one was denied to me on the phone. The response I got, though, pretty much was summed up, “Thanks for declining us. Good luck, pal.” I was surprised that such an uncompromising timeline really stuck. I don’t feel that I am typically one who wishes a hard time on those who give me a hard time, but I am glad to say that I received an e-mail this weekend from the person who wasn’t willing to compromise by a day on the timeline. The e-mail stated that I would be getting called tomorrow to discuss our search processes.

Needless to say, they received an e-mail from me saying they are no longer a part of my search process.

Apparently, this institution has a history of offering like this to all levels of staff. That’s not the place for me. It seems that it’s not the place for others, either, as apparently they were not able to get enough people to accept this past week.

This story seems to sum up my thoughts about the power of the candidate. I think far too often new job candidates underestimate their worth and negotiating power. I know that there isn’t a magic formula for knowing how much power a candidate has, but there are some factors that help determine your power.

A good example, and the easiest to determine in my opinion, is “supply and demand.”

In short, if they are hiring for a larger number of positions, you may have some level of power in negotiating timelines, salaries, other tangibles (moving expenses, preference in living location). A good and fair question to ask to determine the “demand” is: “How many positions are you hiring for and how many candidates are you inviting onto campus?”

You can also ask, “Where do I stand as a candidate with your institution?” If they are highly interested, more than likely they will share that information.

This does not apply only to institutions that are hiring a large number. The more important factor to look at is the ratio between open positions and candidates invited on-campus.



Alright, enough of the strategic talk. I hope to have this search process wrapped up by the end of the week. That’s the plan. My wife and I have it narrowed down to two schools and the timing is perfect. I’m pretty confident I will have one offer that I believe I will have high negotiating power with and a potential offer from another institution. Regardless, I will hear from one institution this week and will use it to solicit information in regards to where I stand with the other institution. Based on the details that we can work out, I hope to select a position.

My wife and I (and our families) are holding our breath in regards to which job we will select if both offer.

The decision of the next chapter of our lives is quickly coming to the decision we feared most: a great opportunity in a dream location far from family versus a great-but-not-dreamy opportunity in a great community (but far colder) closer to family?

Stay tuned for the surprising results (even we don’t know yet…)…

Suddenly I see, this is what I wanna be.... #15

I survived ACPA 2008.
They should give everyone who goes through placement a t-shirt with this slogan. We deserve it.

All in all, placement was a huge success. Even if something happened and nothing came from all of my interviews, I would still be satisfied. I definitely got plenty of interview experience and I learned (very quickly) how to answer different questions. I got to experience a degree of anxiety that I didn't know existed, and I learned what points about my experience to highlight.

I ended up interviewing with 11 different institutions and I did 2 second interviews. I had amazing experiences and then I also had the ones that completely left me in shock with the level of unprofessionalism. It's amazing the types of things that you encounter in these situations. I've seen (and also heard of) interviewers staring around the room while a candidate is talking. Doodling. Not writing anything. Having no pen or paper to even think about using to write with. Yawning. I definitely got a good lesson in interviewing skills for when I'm on the other side of the table.

I had the pleasure of finding an amazing institution that has everything I'm looking for. It's quickly jumped to be my #1 choice, and I'm fairly confident that I'll get an invite for an on-campus interview. There were other places that also caught my attention, and now I have a list of 5 or 6 institutions that I would love to take a closer look at. I keep reminding myself that there are other jobs outside of ACPA that I've also applied for, and I have other interviews coming up in the future. I didn't think that I'd find anything out of this process, at least nothing to the level of success that I feel I've reached. I'm a lucky one - many others from my program didn't have nearly of the level of satisfaction that I experienced.

There were a few positions that my friends and I both applied to, not finding out until we got there that we were both interviewing. I'm proud that, at least publicly, no one seemed to have a problem with it. There still doesn't seem to be a high level of competition among us, and it definitely makes it a lot more fun. Being able to see one another and talk and joke around helped keep everyone a bit more sane.

Now I play the waiting game. I sent off some follow-up emails this morning, but I know that it could be another week or so before I hear from some places. I'm hoping that those who are very interested move quickly - I would love to be to keep my job search energy high and ride the wave of adrenaline I still have from placement. Higher Ed isn't a very fast-moving field, and so I'm prepared to wait it out. I just hope I don't have to wait very long.

The Great Fishbowl Quest #14

Wow.

Good opening for both me and my blogging buddy.

There is a job offer on the table.

I’m grateful for the offer. It was an interview I enjoyed, the people I met on campus were great, and the job would be close to home. Here is why there is no exclamation point on that sentence.

This past week I had an on-campus interview that exceeded the offered job in every category except for being closer to home. I also have my third on-campus interview scheduled for Friday of this week. Now, typically, because I enjoyed the interview and could see myself working there, I would ask for time to make a decision. This way, if the excellent institution didn’t offer (I believe they are only inviting three onto campus), I wouldn’t end up jobless or taking a job somewhere that I didn’t enjoy.

I asked if I could contact them in two weeks. They laughed.

I explained that I had one more on-campus this Friday. They were gracious and gave me this whole weekend to decide.

Keep in mind they contacted me on Thursday.

From what I’ve heard and experienced, this is a rather unrealistic timeline. Typically, when you ask for a specific length of time for a specific reason, you can get it. If not, there is some level of compromise that you can work with. In this conversation, no compromise was made, regardless of the number of options I attempted to provide.

It can mean different things, but at this point in the process, I see it as a bad sign. To me, it says that there is poor planning on their part, high pressure to have me accept before checking out my options, and it communicates a lack of foresight. I was told when I finished interviewing that there would be every effort made to accommodate my timeline as necessary within reason; now I’m being told there is no time for a decision to be made.

Having to make a decision in such a short period of time, I asked if they could tell me what position I would fill. I was told that they weren’t sure if I would be placed in one of two halls. This typically occurs when hiring multiple professionals for the same level of position. However, wanting a quick response from me warrants me having extra information. I was told I could end up in an all-male hall composed of mainly freshmen or a co-ed hall of upperclassmen. These are two very distinct populations. One of which I’d be excited to work with, one of which I’d be somewhat hesitant.

Needless to say, I’m going to have to respond tomorrow declining the position. This is very frustrating, as I did enjoy my experience and could see myself working at the institution down the road. Also, from a practical point of view, having a “contingency” plan never hurts. I know that we don’t tend to talk about “Plan B’s,” but they make sense to have. I didn’t really view this institution as a “Plan B” yet; there is still one other institution I wanted to be able to compare it with.

So…I am officially making the decision to continue this exhausting process and tell a pretty good place that at this moment in time, if they require a response, I’m not interested.

Suddenly I see, this is what I wanna be.... #14

Wow.

There isn't much more to say than that. Atlanta is amazing.

The city is beautiful and bustling with activity. Our hotel is right downtown, and it's awesome to look outside and see everything going on. I've already been sight-seeing, with more planned. The weather was beautiful (up until the rain that started today) but at least it's still warm. You can feel the humidity already - I have no idea how people stand to be here in the summer.

Today was the first day of interviews. I came with a total of 10; I've added one other first interview and got asked back for a second interview already. The bulk of my interviews so far have been really good. I'm surprised how easy some of them go. A few have been not-so-thrilling, but I wasn't expecting everything to be fantastic. The placement center seems a lot calmer than what it was last year. With everything very separated out this year (unlike the Joint Conference last year where the majority of everything was crammed into one large room) there's a lot less noise and it feels like a lot nicer of an atmosphere.

I'm still not sure if I'm going to make it to any sessions or not. I haven't even cracked the book yet to look at what's out there and when. I have plans to make it to the opening session, if nothing else. We'll see what happens. I'm very glad that my extreme nerves of last night have subsided. I was eerily calm this morning, and it lasted all day long. I'm currently exhausted. Even though it's Saturday night and I have plenty of time to go out and about, I'm not sure that I'll actually make it. It's hard work talking about yourself all day long and sounding absolutely employable :)

The Great Fishbowl Quest #13

5 Minutes Remaining

That's what this whole job search experience feels like at the moment. And now I'm down to 4 minutes remaining. In the past week I've continued my travels and am currently at a public library where I had to beg for the opportunity to use the internet and fill out a guess pass for a dollar that bought me 31 minutes. The first twenty-seven have gone to checking e-mail, finding more directions (which I've had to write out because there is no public printer).

Anyway, I will be posting again soon. The biggest struggle is that I'm tired of searching. I just completed an on-campus interview that was perfect in every way except for our families being so far away. The biggest fear is approaching...what if perfect offers away from home and pretty good offers closer to home? We'll see...

At this point, I've got to go. It's counting down my seconds...Good luck at ACPA, everyone!

Suddenly I see, this is what I wanna be.... #13

Since the start of the week it seems like things have exploded.

My inbox is still getting interview requests, and now they've started via phone. I'm up to 9 scheduled interviews for the conference, with two more email requests hanging out waiting for my response.

I have another institution that's trying to set up a phone interview. Time constraints on both sides have pushed this off until after the conference, thankfully.

I scheduled an on-campus interview yesterday. Not the one I've previously mentioned; I'm waiting for a reply back from them. This is another one, who apparently isn't doing phone interviews....or else I made beyond that round with just my experience. This one is an interesting one because of where it's at, and I think everyone is surprised when I tell them that I'm interviewing. Hell, I'm surprised. But it would be fun and enjoyable and I'm not going to turn down an interview for reasons that I don't feel are really worth giving up this type of opportunity.

I feel like I'm standing still and watching everything around me fly by. Most of my prep for ACPA is done, there's just a few last minute things left to finish up. I'm saving all of my packing and outfit configuring until Thursday, mainly because I'll have no time to do any of that until then. I am sure I will spend the evening trying to cleverly fold and maneuver everything into one suitcase, one carry-on, and my purse. I'm refusing, at this point, to check two bags and increase the risk that one or both of them won't make it to Atlanta. My flight leaves Friday morning and then this whirlwind weekend begins.

As for the actual conference....at this point I'm betting that I won't make it to very many sessions. I haven't looked at what's being offered, but I know that there will be things that I'll wish I could be at and won't be able to get to. The greater good is finding a position that fits me.

So, I'm off to start my day and make long lists of all the things I need. I feel like I'm preparing for some huge event that will change my life. Despite my tendencies to wax philosophical about things, I think this time it's actually true. Good luck to all my other job search companions out there -- ACPA, here I come!

Suddenly I see, this is what I wanna be.... #12

It's a week until the conference and suddenly my inbox has exploded with interview offers. I'm getting multiple invites a day and it's getting overwhelming. The good thing is that I'm starting to actually get a little picky, and so it's easier to decide who I will meet with and who isn't really interesting. I still just have the 6 interviews for now, but I'm planning on setting up at least one or two more before I head off next Friday. I'm working on setting up the on campus interview that I received last week and I also just got an offer for a phone interview with another institution. The weeks of silence are now yielding a lot of hoopla. It's exciting and overwhelming, but at least it means that people are interested.

A lot of the more recent ACPA interview requests have come from places much farther away than I ever thought I might end up. Some I can easily dismiss - either the place is just not one that appeals to me at all, or the institution doesn't really grab my attention - but others are becoming harder to ignore. The one interview that I mentioned a few entries ago (the one that I was struggling over accepting because of where it's located) is the only "far away" one that I've accepted as of now. I gave in because of how amazing the institution is, how fantastic the students seem to be, and how beautiful the campus looks. The latter was the real kicker. I'm completely won over by atmosphere every time. I could meet these people at ACPA and immediately know that it's not where I want to be.....or I could fall in love with them and the position. We shall see, but I'm keeping an open mind.

All of my stress and anxiety is finally taking a toll on my body. I started getting sick a few days ago and I'm pumping myself full of cold medicine to try and head it off before it turns into something big. Being sick next week is NOT an option. I'm consuming lots of juice and yesterday I slept so much that I'm not really sure how I'm actually still tired. None of this makes my to-do list any shorter, and so I'll finally venture out of my apartment today and try to rejoin society.

I hope to update again before leaving for the conference, and definitely (if time allows it) while I'm there. The more entertaining bits might be any stories I have of the airport and the flight. I'm not the most calm flyer and I still don't really understand how everything at the airport functions, so there's bound to be something mildly embarrassing to share. I'm also hoping that Atlanta is somewhat put back together by next week. I've been wondering if everything is still set for the conference, but I got an email a few days ago saying that the hotels and conference center are ready to go. I just need to make sure that I am, too.

The Great Fishbowl Quest #12

I apologize for going silent for a solid eight days. Today was our comprehensive exam. Honestly, it wasn’t that bad at all. I’m proud to say that at no point in time did I lose sleep in preparing for this test. I have successfully kept from sacrificing sleep in regards to the job search or prepping for what my cohort has referred to as “the test with no name.” Hopefully, everyone is as confident as I am with our performance on the test. The looks on some of my peers’ faces don’t have me convinced.

Anyway, with the job search, I have to say that I’m a little anxious. Up until now, I’ve done well at predicting the “traffic” of interview requests and on-campus offers. I predicted incorrectly, though, that more institutions would be getting in contact with me this week than the number that got in contact with me last week. At the beginning of this week, I declined three on-campus interview offers. I was confident that one of those would pretty much translate into a job offer very quickly. I keep telling myself that I knew that none of those were going to provide the right “fit” for my wife and I, but it would have been nice to have accepted more on-campuses than I’ve declined. I’ve been comparing offers of on-campuses with the one that I have already completed. The only possible flaw in this strategy is that if that institution doesn’t offer a job, it isn’t going to do me any good to have turned down everybody else.

I do have one on-campus I’ll be doing this next week during my spring break. I’m pretty excited about the opportunity, but the job I was originally interviewed for (and considered strongly for) has changed. I’m now being interviewed for a job that is quite different within the same department. We’ll see. I’m really excited about the new opportunity, possibly more than the original job I interviewed for. This interview requires a presentation, though, so it would be wise if I stopped blogging and started working.

Taking my own advice isn’t something I do when I finish such a big accomplishment as comps. I’ll keep writing.

Unless I hear from a few institutions by the end of this week, my interest list drops to six institutions. One of the institutions that I’m very interested in has just notified me that the position they were considering me for may be changing (seems to be a trend). The problem with this is that it may create a different opening that I can’t be considered for (female only). I’m disappointed just thinking about it. We’ll see.

My peers are having varying experiences. One of my close friends attempted to get into another master’s program and was unsuccessful with the institution she was hoping for. Seeing somebody I care about having to shift to Plan B and let go of Plan A is disheartening. Another one of my colleagues is starting to receive “no longer considering you” communication.

At this point, I’d really take any communication. I think tomorrow I will begin contacting the institutions left on my list. I’m starting to worry about the silence.

Suddenly I see, this is what I wanna be.... #11

My concentration level has taken a nose-dive. I can't stay focused on anything and my mind is all over the place. I will directly blame daylight savings time.

It's nice to suddenly have sunshine into the evening hours, but not when I lose an hour of my life to make it happen. I thought I was ready for the Saturday night change over last week, but Sunday came and I felt like I was lost and confused. I couldn't fall asleep and then, of course, I was exhausted Monday morning. This lasted the entire week. How I actually made it to class is beyond me. And of course, when it comes time for this weekend and I'm finally able to sleep in, I sleep one hour later than normal and then wake up. I just can't win.

My classmates have returned from NASPA with stories about second and third interviews and on-campus requests. I am jealous, and I can't wait for ACPA to get here. 2 more weeks and I'll be freaking out about everything and preparing for my own interviews. I haven't scheduled any more and I haven't contacted anyone new; suddenly there's not a whole lot up on the site that interests me.

The big news for the week was an email I received regarding one of the phone interviews I did last month......they want to meet with me in person!!!! I am incredibly excited. This job is awesome because:
1. It seems like something that would amazing to get involved with, and I know I'm good at it.
2. It's in (what I hear is) a really cool place.
3. I don't think it snows there, or if it does, it's nothing like what I'm putting up with here.
4. The institution is...well, there are no words. It's a place that when I mention it to my friends as an option for me they say, "Ohhh yeah. I can totally see you there."

I can't wait to hear back so I can set something up. I was starting to have mini anxiety attacks about not being a viable candidate for ANYTHING, and then here is someone who is interested in me. While I'm definitely still worked up about this whole process, I've gone down a few notches on the crazy meter.

So I guess it's time to use my day wisely and start in on the many things that I need to get done. The only good part about being up early is then having the opportunity to take a nap. And as a grad student who's schedule is pretty much always out of control, I never pass up the chance to curl up and sleep.

The Great Fishbowl Quest #11

So much to write about, so little time. I have comps in eight days and we have recruitment going on for both our graduate staff and our undergraduate RA staff. I think for the purposes of today’s post, I will focus on what I learned from NASPA’s TPE and hopefully that will help my blogging buddy and others going to ACPA.

This was my second placement exchange of the season. I think I have now attended one of the smallest popular placement exchanges and one of the largest. People kept telling me how different it was going to be and to be quite honest, I didn’t see too much of a difference. Yes, it TPE was a lot larger than SPE. Instead of one waiting area, there were seven. Instead of 100 mailboxes there were 1,000 (maybe less, maybe more…I was too busy to count). Overall, though, you could use the same pattern of: interview, write your thoughts, prepare for your next interview, interview, etc.

The biggest difference I noticed immediately was the other candidates. It seemed as if I walked into the wrong conference: not one person was smiling. I understand and appreciate professionalism (I’m not one of those people that get excited about glitter or training themes), but I felt as if I had walked into a union meeting of the Cubicle Corporation. This, of course, made me smile and slow my pace as I walked. It was a perfect opportunity to exude my warmth and optimism! With “poker faces” racing by on every side, I took the time to make eye contact as I strolled through the main hall and the reaction was great: it kept me calm and it got others interested (at least curious) in me.

This is not to say I was the James Bond of the conference. I most definitely messed up an interview one night (yeah…night); apparently I could no longer translate “student affairs” speak into English. The mistake that bothered me the most occurred in a second interview. It was one of those interviews that you feel like you can’t get any “points” in; the goal is to stay at zero and avoid negative points. Well, I was doing well until I was questioning the employer and asked about a program that wasn’t in place at their institution (it was most definitely a program I had learned about at that bad interview the night before). I think, typically, employers would say something simple: “You must be thinking of something at another institution.” Instead, the employers chose the most awkward option and said nothing about my mistake. They simply answered the question in a very vague manner. Quite honestly, it created some concerns to me when they weren’t willing to address that I made a mistake: I make a lot; I could have handled it).

With both placement exchanges done for me, at this point it is working out who I will accept on-campus interviews with if offered. I have one completed that went well. I believe, at most, I can pull off five more on-campus interviews this semester. My concern is that I’m interested in seven. Strangely enough, there would be some level of relief if two or three of these institutions that seem interested decided to pass me up. Of course, though, I want 100% of the schools I’m interested in to offer on-campuses and jobs.

We’ll see.

Suddenly I see, this is what I wanna be.... #10

I'm starting to wonder if the key to things actually happening with my job search is me blogging about how it's stagnant.

Since posting the other day I have scheduled 3 more ACPA interviews AND have had a phone interview. I feel like I hit 'submit' and everything exploded on me. This is definitely all a good thing. I'm starting to feel a little more calm about the conference in terms of the number of my interviews. I can handle 6; I think 10-15 would be my ideal. Even as I say that it seems like way too many. I just want to get the most out of the conference experience, and to do that is to take full advantage of placement. Overall, I just submitted an application for my 26th position. It kind of feels like I've done way more than that.

The phone interview went well....I think. I'm afraid to even guess anymore, as it seems like I can never really tell what anyone's reaction is. I'm hoping it went well - the institution is definitely one that looks incredible and offers much of what I'm looking for. I have a connection to someone who used to work there, and much of what I thought about the place seems to be correct. I can't believe that I have "connections".

I'm starting to go into hyper-organized mode. I've already begun to make special folders (in addition to the ones I already have) for those institutions I'll be speaking with at ACPA. I'm making lists of things I still need to gather up, things I need to remember to bring with me. I'm trying to figure out what suitcases to pack (yes, that is a plural 'suitcases'. I tend to overpack. I don't even try to stop it, I just embrace it and work with it.) and what I can squish down to a smaller size so I have more space. I'm starting to look into what there is to do in Atlanta as well. I have no idea if I'll have any time to be a tourist (especially since I'd like to make it to a few sessions at the conference), but I have to get out and do some vacation-like things admist this crazy and stressful process. I've never been to Atlanta, but it seems amazing and fun.

Back in reality, I'm working on a schedule for work and trying to figure out how many hours I have to put in over spring break. I'm working the Second Job a little extra (because I am, obviously, asking to have a mental breakdown) so that I can have some extra money for the trip. It's amazing that I find time to eat, sleep, and go to class.

I will spend my weekend trying to keep up with homework and having fun here and there. My usual dormant social life is suddenly coming around to exciting things. It's such a double-edged sword; while I'm thankful for having the time to go out and connect with my friends I've made since moving here, it's hard to get closer and closer to some people while knowing that I will more than likely be packing up and moving by the end of summer.

Oh, and the last 2% of my plant died. I have no idea what happened to it, but this part died as suddenly as the last. I suppose I'm lucky I can keep myself up and running, let alone worry about anything/one else.

The Great Fishbowl Quest #10

I got back really late (or really early) the other night after driving 8½ hours from an 8-hour day of interviewing on-campus. My wife and I took a weekend trip that consisted of my hours logged in driving than in visiting or interviewing, but it was an insightful trip regardless. We visited four institutions in one weekend, two of which I had interviewed with at SPE, and two of which I have interviews set up for NASPA. Interestingly enough, once again an institution that had been near the top of my list just jumped off Interest Cliff. The institution was too urban for our liking and the people weren’t as friendly as we were hoping for. Visiting informally has its advantages of getting to really see a place for what it may be, as long as you can see the things you’re wanting to without help.

The on-campus interview went fantastically. Quite honestly, this was a department that truly appears to live up to its stated values. If you’re wondering how to test that (because you may have noticed most institutions say that they are “student-focused”), it’s pretty simple. Talk to everybody you make eye contact with (I said “simple,” not “easy). I know that’s a little exaggerated, but it is important to talk to a variety of people that haven’t necessarily been selected to interview you. When you do that, you’ve got to look for consistency in answers and themes that emerge. In this instance, it became clear based on everybody that I talked to that the entire staff and the students feel valued and listened to. For me, that’s a pretty big deal. Because of all of this, this institution is pretty high on my list, and I can’t imagine there being a group of people that could top this group of people. With that said, though, the apartment I saw was frighteningly small to live in with a spouse and it’s a bit in the middle of nowhere. I don’t want to make a decision on those factors, but those factors may be enough to knock it out of number one if I can find an equally awesome staff in a better location with a nicer place to call home for the next few years.

Anxiety is pretty much choking me every time I turn on my brain to think, which is disappointing, since thinking is a bit critical right now. Last night was my one chance to get a good night’s sleep this week and that didn’t happen. I’ll be getting up around 4:00 in the morning to head to the airport to get to NASPA. I feel that I can be prepared for NASPA without too much trouble, but I haven’t prepared at all for comps (pesky little detail that determines if I graduate) and it is in 15 days. Wait a minute while I grab my paper bag and do my breathing exercises.

Writing in this blog has proved to be helpful, but even now my time grows short. I have a phone interview in twenty minutes and I believe that if they are interested, I receive an invitation to come onto campus. Sadly, I feel that this may be a waste of time because even if I do well, I can’t justify traveling to a campus based on a thirty-minute phone conversation. It is hard enough to do that based on spending thirty minutes with a person or two at an exchange.

Anyway, I’ve experienced a lot of the same frustration and anxiety that my blogging buddy has, although the advice she has received is completely true. It is very typical to get e-mailed in the last few days before an exchange, even if you have e-mailed the institution weeks ago.

Reminds me a good vent story to share, but I’ve got to prep for this interview. Maybe next time. Good luck to those of you traveling to Boston!

Oh! The "open interview" I was trying to figure out: In this instance, "open interview" meant that it was open for anybody to attend, although specific people had been chosen to be a part of it as well. I interviewed with people from high in the food chain to low on the totem pole, all at once.

Suddenly I see, this is what I wanna be.... #9

Three weeks from Friday I leave for ACPA.

I just scheduled my third interview. That's it. 3 interviews.

I can slowly feel my inner workings starting to switch into high panic mode. I'm getting reassurance across the board that this is what happens and then the week before (or even once you get there) ACPA employers are like, "Wha? I have to go interview people? OMG we need candidates!!!" Then you get a million emails from all over the place and suddenly your schedule is full. I'm trying to believe that. I really, really am. It just seems too unorganized for me to completely buy into. But what do I know? I'm just a soon-to-be-unemployed grad student :/

In the past week I've sent out a load of emails to ACPA employers, with more to go out as soon as I start nosing around the site again. I'm disheartened by the lack of response by some people. I'd take even a "Thanks, but no thanks" at this point. The people that respond within HOURS of my email are what make me happy. Like the institution that did that on a SUNDAY. And I'll tell you what, while I am obviously interested in said institution and the position that they have open, I'm definitely taking a closer look now that I've seen how prompt they are.

Of course, I'm guilty of this same thing. I have a request to interview sitting in my inbox since last week. I haven't responded yet, but it's on my list of things to do. You know, if I ever figure out if I want to accept the interview or not. This is a more of a mental battle than anything else - the school is amazing. Literally, it's the type of place that I had already thought about months ago and went "Wow. Working at a place like THAT would be the best thing since sliced bread." The downside (cause there always is) is that it's not in my geographic area I'm looking in (well, as much as you can say that I have a "geographic area" that's limiting me). And when I mean "not in my geographic area" I mean that this place is really nowhere in the vicinity of it that I feel like I can't even try and justify being there. Mark down another job search dilemma to the list....

Also found out that I've been passed up on one of the positions I phone interviewed for. It was the first one, the one that I knew went a little iffy. I'm not sad about it.....I don't know how I feel. Just sort of accepting and ready to move on to more interviews and opportunities.

I'm hoping my interviewing skills will be better than my gardening skills. Last week I bought this beautiful plant with all these bright purple flowers. Seemed perfect for me, maintenance wise - moderate water and sunlight needed. The plant and I were coexisting nicely until it suddenly collapsed on itself sometime yesterday between 8:30 and 5:30. About 98% of the plant died, and I have no idea what caused it. I'm hoping I can revive the remaining 2%. Perhaps the plant couldn't take the disarray that surrounds it :)

The Great Fishbowl Quest #9

Posting two days in a row?! I promise not to make a habit of it.

I’m leaving in less than two hours to drive to an undisclosed set of institutions to unofficially check out their campuses and communities. The job search process gets trickier when there are two lives to consider instead of one. With an on-campus interview scheduled for Monday, it seemed to make sense to make the most of the trip and check out other institutions nearby. By doing this, if I am offered any other on-campuses, my wife will have already had the opportunity to check out the schools and communities. It will also give me something extra to talk about when I travel to NASPA next week.

Despite the amount of last-minute work I’m doing to get out of here on time (although I found time to sit and blog…where are my priorities?), I feel very optimistic at the moment. Multiple institutions have offered on-campuses and I still have one more exchange to attend; I’m getting to get away from campus and get some good old-fashioned road-trip therapy; and I only slightly panic when I think about comps which are within three weeks that I am not more than 10% prepared for.

Thoughts about my on-campus are somewhat mixed. I am very excited about the institution and have only heard good things from those that have worked there and professionals nearby. I believe that I typically do really well at on-campuses and look forward to the chance to get a real feel for the place.

Only question I currently have: What does “open interview” mean? My itinerary does well at telling me the variety of people I will be interviewing with during my stay; however, I have two hour-long “open interviews” scheduled back-to-back in the same room. My guess is that professionals and staff will be made aware that a candidate will be on-campus and available to meet and question during those two times.

When I find out, I’ll let you know. I'm hoping that hearing the song, "Suddenly I See," as I type this is a good omen.

Good luck to those of you recruiting and being recruited at OPE this weekend and good luck to those attempting to prepare for TPE at NASPA which is quickly approaching.

For those of you attempting to do both OPE and TPE, may God have mercy on your souls.

Suddenly I see, this is what I wanna be.... #8

I am faced with an interesting combination of feelings these days.

First, I am now one month from ACPA. This leaves me excited and anxious to get there and start interviewing. I already have a few things scheduled, with many others in the mix. I'm quickly becoming addicted to the ACPA candidate site, looking all around at the positions out there and deciding what is worth my time. It's like an insane grocery store with all these options of different kinds of food, but instead there are all these institutional types to choose from.

This would be easier if I knew exactly what type of institution I was after, as well as where I want to go. I'm doing a fairly broad search, both in type of position and geographic location, which I thought was a good idea. I'm pretty marketable (if I may toot my own horn) in several areas, and why not experiment and see what's available to me? Location is an ever-evolving challenge. There are some cities/areas that I am specifically looking in. There are also many states that I never thought I would consider going to that are now definitely on my radar screen.

I thought that having nothing holding me back would be a blessing, but I'm starting to wish that I had a major anchor holding me down -- only so that decision making would be easier. And even as I type these words my brain is racing and a little voice is saying, "Self! You know how much you LOVE that you can look where you please. You would be so unhappy with limited resources!!"

The voice is right. This is only the tip of the iceberg with my emotions. Read on.

What creates more of the oil and water mixture of my feelings is when you factor in the overwhelming lack of motivation that's starting to seep in. Yes, I'm still managing to harvest some for the use of my job search, but getting a job will mean nothing unless I actually complete my degree. Unfortunately, reading for class and writing papers is not really attention-grabbing these days. It's the time of year - spring is nowhere to be found (with no inclination that it'll be around anytime in the near future) but I'm well aware of how close spring break is. I want that week off (although my insanity has kicked in, and I'm committing to a week of work at BOTH the Assistantship and the Second Job). I want to lay around my apartment and stare at the walls. I want to watch massive amounts of television, think nothing at all about school, and enjoy the peace and quiet.

Of course, I also want a job. Alas...what's a girl to do?

I suppose there's nothing else to do but suck it up and get things done. The great prospects of ACPA should be enough fuel to kick my ass in gear and make it through the next few months. I've hit this type of slump before, and always during this time of year. Too much snow and too much stress is enough to make my motivation pack up and head for warmer clilmates.

The Great Fishbowl Quest #8

Okay, put your seatbelt on and secure your helmets. I’m hearing a good number of questions and rumblings from my grad student colleagues both on my campus and on others.

Stop showing all your cards so early! If employers ask (which they will) where they fall in your ranking, you do not have to tell them early on.

If you’re interested, but it is still early in the process:
“I really enjoyed this, this, and this about your institution and department. After talking with you, I’m interested in continuing to pursue the position. However, I still have other interviews scheduled so I don’t think that I can tell you with accuracy where you fall in my ranking.”

If you’re not interested at any point:
“I enjoyed this and this about your institution, but I don’t think the position is right for me because (I’m looking for a higher level of responsibility/I’m looking for a smaller department/etc).”

Personally, I think it is bad practice for employers to ask your “ranking” of them at an exchange. The ones that may ask are completely comfortable with you telling them that you need time to process and compare your options. More than likely, they asked in hopes that you would give them “bonus” information. It will not hurt your “score” as a candidate to hold back. In fact, at an exchange I think you’re more likely to harm yourself by sharing that information than help.

I think the tendency to share information is based in excitement and thinking that if you tell the employer they’re in your “Top 3,” it will help. Not necessarily. Here are ways that it may damage you:

1) Employers talk to each other. If you commit to giving them a “ranking,” that information may be shared.
2) If an institution knows you’re “super excited” and they are your “number one” it won’t really get you anywhere early on. If they’re interested in you, they’ll pursue you, anyway. Telling them how high they rank may lower the amount of energy they spend trying to recruit you. They may contact other candidates prior to contacting you.
3) Your ranking can change. If you tell a school that they are in your “top three,” they will carry the assumption that you will want to move into the next phase (possibly an on-campus interview). If you turn it down (which you will find to be much harder), they may actually experience a feeling of frustration with you.

LESSON 1: Don’t show employers your cards: regardless of your excitement, level of interest, or fear of losing their interest. I promise that you can get a job without ever telling one school that they are your number one.

LESSON 2: Don’t leave employers hanging when you decide that you aren’t interested. Let them know as soon as you make the decision. There is nothing more frustrating than a candidate who shows interest and then never responds.

You have control as a candidate to pick who you interview with and who you pursue. After all, you’re the one committing to a new job.